1983 4 of 4
11/7/83: 1:45AM: ESSENCE: Now I seem to know what it means. Drunk on the awful champagne that I'm trying to get rid of, having thought (dealing only with stamps for the last few days) that I do nothing for anyone ELSE (and just having spent a large part of the day with Sandra, Edgardo's friend in New York ordering medicine for her mother and feeling VERY good about it), I think about my good feelings from the two good movies today (The Man from the Snowy River and We of the Never Never), my good feelings from Sandra, my good feelings for Bill, having listened to him on the tape for the umpteenth time, waiting until 2:l5AM to phone Jean-Jacques in Paris about Wagner's opera at Bayreuth, having just read Gael Greene about French cooking, knowing that I've HAD dinner from Alain Sendrens at the Maurice in the Parker Meridien with Marck Smith (for $l00 even apiece), I feel so GOOD that I realize that THIS is what essence is: going over the past of your life and seeing the friends, the places, the experiences, the knowledge, the feelings, the sensations, and having touches of all of them NOW (though the touch of the BEAUTIFUL guy on the subway, that I was ACHING to talk to, and then DIDN't, and got the "message" that I'm intended to TALK to more people than I do, but that doesn't help much, now, does it?), THAT IS ESSENCE! So I have to dash to the computer to get them all down, thinking of Sandra coming over on Tuesday, cleaning up for her appearance, doing the index for Lea and Febiger by Thursday, working on stamps more, going to plays and opera, watching TV, seeing movies at Arnie's, talking to friends, it's all WONDERFUL, and I think of AIDS and that I might be DYING in the next couple of years and WHAT HAVE I GOT FROM IT BESIDE the essence from the past lives: the places like Milan and Northcape and Africa and Venice and Grand Canyon in the camper with sexy Chuck Coe, IBM and indexing, Actualism and est, John and Dennis as lovers, Bill and Ralph Gray and Julian Gerard: the names just go on and on: and here I am at a computer taking them all down, having just worked with stamps: putting the world in order! Having just tried working with the energies of Actualism and not being able to concentrate, yet somehow KNOWING that the Immortal will "take care of things" and that even when BRAIN-MIND is out to lunch or alcohols-ville, my IMMORTAL can be doing nice things. And things are getting so RICH: they're talking about interactive laser videodiscs, new forms of computers, genetic controls (though the article didn't say a WORD about AIDS), sexual freedom, movies that (even TV music videos) give you the sexiness and excitement you CRAVE----and all this in ONE life that's not yet quite half over (unless it's RATHER more than half over), and just about time to try to get Jean-Jacques on the telephone! And at 2:10AM he's THERE, at breakfast, "just as you planned," he says, and clear EVERYTHING up, happy to hear that "for Christmas" the french got ABSOLVED of their cash restrictions on traveling. So GOOD to talk with him, and now I'm feeling JUST fine!!!
11/24/83: 1AM: AGAIN I HAVE TO WRITE: Reading "Book of the New Sun" and come to the part in which the hero says "To have said yes would be to have made the journey," and my eyes sting shut with tears: how often is this JUST what I would have wanted to do: as I kept shouting to Casteneda "BELIEVE"; and to other heros like the monk in "Journey to the West" BELIEVE, yet I do not believe, I do not trust. I fail to make the leap into faith that would lighten my life. Full of the feeling I felt when Andre Gregory, in "My Dinner With Andre," echoed my feelings that "Just when you feel most alive, most connected, you feel closest to death," I want to embrace all the books I've been reading, all the stamps I've been putting in order, all the books I've got to index, my friends, my travels, my Actualism energies, and TRANSMUTE them into earth-saving elixir, planet-developing balm. The spiral of life seems to decrease in diameter as it rises up the mountain of time: I find myself above the same lakes, looking down at the same rivers, more quickly than in previous years. Here I am again sated with sex, now sated with stamps, now gorged with food, now filled with movies, now replete with music or song or computers. More and more quickly I fill with travel, with friends, with aloneness, with friends again, with solitude again. Soon the spiral shrinks so that I bite my own tail escaping around the corner behind me. IS the fullness of life manifest only in death? Does the recapitulation of pleasure and fear accelerate until the "life flashing before the eyes of the dying" literally come at the end of a smooth progression of diminution of time-span? But here I am, writing again, exhausted by writing again. Written out, because I HAVE written it out!
11/28/83: DO I WANT EGYPT TRIP?
FOR EGYPT TRIP AGAINST EGYPT TRIP
I want to do it Costs too much money at $3386 without
looking at "extra" time-expenses
Travel with James, who knows Egypt He's not the most RESPONSIBLE person
Seeing places very few have seen I've ALREADY been so many places
Travel is exciting, educational I'm still not "full" of NYC, and still want
a lover, stamps, etc.
Chance may never come up again He doesn't know what it's going to be
like; HE may not function well there
I've told people I'm going Heat, discomfort, other people, and
I'M not THAT interested in EGYPT!!
I've told James MAYBE he'd cut the costs for me!!!
At least cut out HIS $25/day=$400!
Somewhat later I try to figure up the FINANCES: how much will I have by Jan l2?
January checking refill (including November and December rents) $800
Trip deposit 3400
Trip cash 1000
January taxes 1500
Total needed $6700
Now have $3990, with total billing of $2200 = $6l90, WHICH IS NOT ENOUGH!!!
THEN when I talk to him on January 6, he says the company is NO good, and he'll NOT deal with them at all, and I'm LUCKY not to have sent in my deposit (though on January 10 he says they DID return the deposits to friends of his). So I'm GLAD I decided the way I DID!
12/5/83: 3:35AM: SO I DID IT ALL! l) went to class, 2) finished records list, 3) ate and drank, 4) read, 5) took in McGraw-Hill index, 6) added Actualism pages, 7) talked of bodywork in center on Sundays, 8) AND FINISHED ALL PUZZLES! And I'm still "on schedule."
12/9/83: 1:30AM: TODAY WAS THE DAY I WENT BACK TO THE GYM after having done only three sessions during the months of October and November. It actually lifts a load to have done it (I had to start sometime; I couldn't just waste the couple hundred I put into the year's membership), and I feel better to get THAT started. Now to debate what to do about Actualism: have NO hours to turn in about the PTM for Wednesday's class, though I've thought about saying I object to being committed to something I didn't agree with. But that'll just get me thrown out, and I'd just as soon stay in, I think. Lot's coming up; indexes to do, lists to do, and I've gotten the juice out of THIS, anyway.
12/19/83: As in "Sabbatical"---the more we HAVE, have down PAT, the more we question and want TRIVIA, which becomes THE problem in our LIVES. There can be no other problems since the "usual" ones of the world (food, shelter, sex, entertainment, reasons for being) are SOLVED! AND, at 48, we STILL think of ourselves as 16.
l2/22/83: My ZIEGFELD GOLDEN PLAZA Day: Phoned this morning to find that the McGraw-Hill party is THIS afternoon at 2, phone movies to find schedules, get to awful party (I keep forgetting it's for KIDS!), but eat lots of junk, talk to Elliot Linzer, who's ORDERED a computer, and get to the Ziegfeld for "Yentl", quite good (except for all the silly songs), with a VERY sexy nude Mandy Patinkin scene, a VERY believable BOY by Streisand, and no GAY overtones between the "men" and no LESBIAN overtones in the "married couple." Great! Have a filling snack in Movenpick, then to the Golden for "night, Mother", which is ANOTHER masterpiece: everything that SHOULD be said IS said, so there's no feeling of "this isn't good", and they're TALKING, so it's not about "there's no communication", and it WORKS. Out, affected (though relieved by the smiles on the actress' faces that THEY won't be committing suicide; they may have been convincing, but they're not playing THEMSELVES), and debate going to "Terms of Endearment" but pay my second $5 (and $6.25 for the Golden) at the Astor Plaza (whose screen seems MUCH bigger and brighter than the Ziegfeld's) for a movie that is THANKFULLY NOT about my mother (Shirley Maclaine's character is MUCH nicer than my mother), and though the cancer-ending is MANIPULATIVE, most of the MOVIE is that, so what. Out PLEASED with the DAY!
12/27/83: 10:27AM: Read in Omni about Peter Medawar's use of l0,000 units of Vitamin A and 3 grams of Vitamin C per day, and I figure my l.5 grams of Vitamin C in the morning makes me healthy for about half a day, and suddenly the idea is truly RIGHT: one's state of health (and immunocompetency!) probably DOES change, literally from minute to minute, so one CAN be "healthy" in the morning (rested, vitamined, fed) and "unhealthy" in the evening (tired, lack of vitamins, boozed up) and thereby VARIABLY succeptible to infections---worst in the EVENING when, ironically, we tend MOST to be around people (with other infections we may catch) and having sex (and getting AIDS). What a pity it seems so unlikely (and difficult) for anyone to actually RESEARCH THE TRUTH of this. Figure I'll call Pope and see if he's heard or read anything like it.
12/28/83: 10AM: Watched an AWFUL "Who's Having Fun" about the Philadelphia Mummers---what a WASTE of ENERGY for them to DO it and for me to WATCH it. Sit after and watch a Rutgers symposium about Aging in America, bouncing off Ashley Montagu's book "Growing Young" (he was born in l905, considerably "younger" at 78 than idiotic farts of 82 and 83, though YOUNGER farts were EVEN MORE idiotic, like the AWFUL guy who INSISTED the old were happy and not in homes!), and someone from the Gray Panthers who rather reminded me of Midge said that it was CRIMINAL that defense spending took up SO much money while it COULD be spent on solving the problems of AGING! I immediately come up with the book title "What ELSE Can I BUY" that would give health-research (twelve diseases cured for each MX missile?) or pleasure-equivalents ($l5 meals for everyone over 21 in the country for one Phantom Bomber?) or comfort-bonuses (a vacation a year for each military satellite?)! AND I get MORE incensed about these PRESIDENTS determining how much their PEOPLE should spend for defense: AGAIN the idea of MY saying where I want MY tax dollars to go. Let all those chauvinistic TEXANS pay for the missiles! AND if the Presidents want to kill, let them have red buttons connected to their PERSONAL DESTRUCTION systems, let them blow THEMSELVES, not the WORLD, to pieces if they get the rag on! OH, what I wouldn't give for a HUNDRED years, to quote Evita!
12/30/83: 3PM: Step back, step back, step BACK: Waiting for a call on the Microbiology index and decide to catch up on notes and print pages at the same time. Print DREAM pages and working on THESE pages when I find an OLD dream: quandary: put the dream in the right place and retype the pages? Easy ENOUGH, but I step back (1) from the CURRENT situation to think that there should be an EASIER way to handle these pages, making a note in COMPUTER CHRONICLE. Then as I come here I step back (2) in trying to think of how to solve the problem: JUST PRECISELY WHAT IS THE POINT of the dream pages: to have everything in chronological order, or just be able to indicate which dreams came where. Then, abruptly, comes the LAST step back (3), which is WHAT IS ANY OF THIS FOR: the writing, the printing, the filing, the recording. And I pause. What IS the answer to that? Easy enough to recall the old ideas: (A) These are my CHILDREN, what I leave BEHIND me, and (B) These replace talking to FRIENDS; I want to SHARE these with someone, but have only the COMPUTER (as I mentioned to Adam when he called last night to try to sell me ANOTHER $300 American fly-anywhere (mainly Hawaii, since you can't go to Brazil or London) ticket that must be used before May 25: the computer is like a CHILD: winning and frustrating, making me exhilirated and depressed, eager and angry, taking a lot of time and costing lots of money but also giving lots of pleasure) to talk to.
12/30/83: NEW answers? Echoes of LSD: ME! I AM important! But now reading poor Teilhard de Chardin who couldn't be published as he lived, but when I read what's published AFTER he's died, it's STILL so "out of Christian dogmatism" that it won't HOPE to be any influence for MANY years, by which time the poor man may be COMPLETELY forgotten. Relevance to my question? Well, I now think impatiently, that's enough for THAT, now on to OTHER things.
12/30/83: 4PM: Got the call, to my satisfaction, and back to the last note to be added to the notebook: my year-end depression, which is so COMMON recently. What does it bring up? I DO WANT SOMEONE, and I'm VERY conscious of not having anyone. Almost makes me think that traveling at year-end is a good idea just to be away from normalcy! Also want things that DON'T turn out: like the orgy group, which turned sour last night. Like stamps, which I got back to with France, and it turned out to take TOO long---though it WAS the last country with previously-sorted PILES of stamps. The COUNTING and MARKING IN THE CATALOG and CLEARING THE ALBUM PAGES just take too much time and gets too finicky for my nerves (and arthrosing fingers). So I did THAT and it didn't last. Now I seem to be in a computer/indexing mode. That should last another month, at least! Now with the EXTRA-LARGE Microbiology index, I have an ACTUAL excuse to give to James about not coming on the trip: don't have to blame it on my evaluation of him OR the trip---and can wait to hear of his reactions on THIS trip before deciding whether it MIGHT be worth taking a SUBSEQUENT one! But with the computer/indexing activity (and re-starting Actualism sessions AND the gym?)---VOILA, no longer DEPRESSED! Even chance of BACH on New Year's Eve!
12/31/83: 12:30PM: Doing the session today REALLY puts me in touch with my LACK OF HONESTY! I HAVE allowed society to build a wall around me: (1) I can't express sexual pleasure in people I see because society says "I'm immoral." (2) I can't cry because "Men don't." (3) I can't show affection or helplessness because "People don't?" So even at someplace as PERMISSIVE as the club, I DON'T. I don't tell people why I LIKE them (Paula, Joe, Michael) or why I DON'T like them (Dennis, Arnold, Bob Grossman). I tell the truth VERY LITTLE. And it DOES take energy from me, and DENY energy from me. INCREDIBLE!
LIFELIST FOR 1983
M 83-01-01* Little Princess
M 83-01-01* Memories of the 50s
M 83-01-03 Airplane II
E 83-01-04 Uncle Charlie's Village
R 83-01-04 One Potato
D 83-01-05 Riverside Gala:GiftofPassage/SwanLakePDD/TalkofTown/DonQPDD
D 83-01-05 Riverside Gala:BeethovenRondo/Spiral/Willowtree/PaquitaPDD
D 83-01-05 Riverside Gala:SummerdanceI/FearfulSymmetry/Alegrias/Charlot
M 83-01-05 Tootsie
R 83-01-05 Empanadas, Etc
M 83-01-08 Harder They Come, The
M 83-01-08 Reggae Sunsplash
M 83-01-09* Good Soldier
R 83-01-09 Henry's End
M 83-01-12 Blood Money
M 83-01-12 Prisoner of Shark Island
M 83-01-12 Undying Monster
B 83-01-13 King: Night Shift
M 83-01-13 Little Night Music, A
M 83-01-13 Tam Lin (Devil's Widow)
M 83-01-14* One Million B.C.
R 83-01-14 Henry's End
M 83-01-16* Tinker, Tailor
M 83-01-16* Young Frankenstein
B 83-01-17 Schneeman: Wild Man
M 83-01-17 Gandhi
M 83-01-18* If I Were King
M 83-01-18* Skin of Our Teeth (San Diego)
E 83-01-19 Battery Park City Lecture
E 83-01-19 Children of Alcoholics Talk
P 83-01-19 Master Harold
B 83-01-20 Heidegger: What Is a Thing?
M 83-01-21* Alligator
M 83-01-21* Five Easy Pieces
M 83-01-24 Sophie's Choice
R 83-01-24 Armstrong's
B 83-01-25 Parker: Short Stories
M 83-01-25 Veronica Voss
R 83-01-25 Henry's End with David
M 83-01-26* Idomeneo (Met: Pavarotti)
O 83-01-26* Idomeneo (Met: Pavarotti)
M 83-01-27* Lawrence of Arabia
M 83-01-28* Fog, The
D 83-01-29 Basel Ballet:DeadEnd/Prelude/TransfiguredNight/Chas!!-FUN
M 83-01-29* Miss Lonelyhearts
M 83-01-29* Phantom of the Opera (Max Schell)
M 83-01-30* Girl, the Gold Watch, and Everything, The
M 83-01-30* Rheingold, Das (Bayreuth)
M 83-01-30* Smokey and the Bandit
O 83-01-30* Rheingold (Bayreuth)
E 83-01-31 Jim Henson talks at CBS
M 83-01-31* Merry Wives of Windsor (BBC)
R 83-01-31 Richoux on 6th Ave.
E 83-02-02 Gamelon at Natural History Museum
M 83-02-02 Call Her Savage
M 83-02-02 King of Burlesque
M 83-02-02 Steamboat 'Round the Bend
R 83-02-03 Windows on the World (Actualism)
R 83-02-04 Smokey's
D 83-02-05 Dance Theater of Harlem: Paquita/GraduationBall/Scheherazade
M 83-02-08* Caddyshack
D 83-02-09 NYC Ballet: DelibesDivertmento/SerenadeInLa/Tzigane/UnionJack
M 83-02-10* Something Evil
E 83-02-12 ASI Seminar on Microcomputers (snowstorm deadened)
P 83-02-13 What I Did Last Summer
D 83-02-14* NYC Ballet: Agon/Variations/Persephone
M 83-02-14 Parsifal
O 83-02-14 Parsifal
R 83-02-15 Henry's End
B 83-02-17 Tolkien: Unfinished Tales
M 83-02-17 Face to Face
M 83-02-17 Music in the Dark (Night Is My Future)
M 83-02-18 Year of Living Dangerously, The
R 83-02-18 Park Plaza
E 83-02-19 Arthur Dworin's Party
R 83-02-22 Lutece (Menu de Degustation with Dennis---not that good)
M 83-02-23 Verdict, The
I 83-02-25 Bruce Lieber commits suicide!
M 83-02-25 Officer and a Gentleman, An
M 83-02-26* Operation (open-heart bypass)
R 83-02-27 Park Plaza
M 83-02-28* Walkure, Die (Bayreuth)
O 83-02-28* Walkure (Bayreuth)
M 83-03-01* Happy Endings
M 83-03-01* Run for Your Money
M 83-03-02 Cry Danger
M 83-03-02 Double Indemnity
M 83-03-02 Lady Scarface
R 83-03-03 Burmese Gardens
R 83-03-03 Elephant and Castle dessert
E 83-03-04 Actualism Memorial Service for Bruce Lieber
B 83-03-05 Highwater: Primal Mind, The
M 83-03-05* Bruce Lee, His Last Days
M 83-03-05* Jazz Singer (Diamond)
B 83-03-08 Hamilton: Best of Edmund Hamilton
B 83-03-08 Lem: Memoirs of a Space Traveller
M 83-03-08* My Brilliant Career
M 83-03-09 House by the River
M 83-03-09 Ministry of Fear
M 83-03-09 Strange Impersonation
P 83-03-09 Amadeus (David Dukes)
R 83-03-09 Forty-Third Street Balloon
R 83-03-09 Mimosa
R 83-03-10 Crawdaddy
M 83-03-12 Aguirre: The Wrath of God
M 83-03-12 Stroszek
M 83-03-13* On Approval
O 83-03-14 Walkure Rehearsal at Met ( , )
R 83-03-16 Fon Yuen with Dennis and Susan (VISA never submitted!)
R 83-03-16 Park Plaza with David
M 83-03-17* Magic Planet (ice show)
M 83-03-17* Marx Brothers
M 83-03-17* Miss Moberly's Ghosts
M 83-03-19* Big Clock
R 83-03-20 Chuan Yuan
B 83-03-21 Stephens: Incidents of Travel in the Yucutan
D 83-03-22 Hamburg Ballet: Midsummer Night's Dream---FABULOUS
M 83-03-23* Tannhauser (Met: Eva Marton)
O 83-03-23* Tannhauser (Met: Eva Marton)
D 83-03-25 Hamburg Ballet: Mahler's Third
D 83-03-25 Men Together Dance
M 83-03-25 Frances
D 83-03-26 Hamburg Ballet: Vaslav/Legend of Joseph(deLavallade)
D 83-03-27 Hamburg Ballet: St. Matthew Passion
E 83-03-27 Carol Ann Schofield
M 83-03-27* King Henry VI, Part lA (BBC)
B 83-03-28 AAA(ed.): BASIC Manual
R 83-03-28 Parker Meridian with Marck Smith (GREAT)
M 83-03-29* High Anxiety
E 83-03-30 Actualism reception for Carol Ann, Married Gil and Ann
R 83-04-01 Henry's End
B 83-04-02 Roth: Zuckerman Unbound
M 83-04-03* King Henry VI, Part lB (BBC)
B 83-04-04 Holzman: Take It Off (taxes)
M 83-04-06 Alias Nick Beal
M 83-04-06 Berlin Express
M 83-04-06 Try and Get Me
M 83-04-08* I Walked with a Zombie
M 83-04-09* West Side Story
R 83-04-09 Buon Gusto
M 83-04-11 Meaning of Life (Monty Python)
R 83-04-11 Griff's
R 83-04-11 Rincon Argentina
D 83-04-13 Ballet: All's Well (?)
M 83-04-17* King Henry VI, Part 2 (BBC)
M 83-04-17* Siegfried, Acts I and II (Bayreuth)
O 83-04-17* Siegfried, Acts I and II (Bayreuth)
D 83-04-19 Royal Ballet
R 83-04-19 Center Court
E 83-04-21 Meredith Cabaret at Plexus for Sherryl's birthday
D 83-04-23 Royal Ballet: Mayerling
M 83-04-23* Medal of Honor Rag
M 83-04-24* King Henry VI, Part 3A (BBC)
M 83-04-24* Siegfried, Act III (Bayreuth)
O 83-04-24* Siegfried, Act III (Bayreuth)
D 83-05-02 NYC Ballet: Gala:Duets/Harlequinade/SlpgBtyPDD/FlowrFestvlPDD
D 83-05-02 NYC Ballet: Gala:SwanLakePDD/CorsairPDD/SymphonieConcertante
E 83-05-02 Windows on World with Jean-Jacques for view
R 83-05-02 Peking Duck
M 83-05-03* Devil and the Deep
R 83-05-04 Peking Duck (Actualism)
B 83-05-05 Burroughs: Ali's Smile/Naked Scientology
I 83-05-05 Work-Deliver most expensive index ($9600)
P 83-05-07 Private Lives (Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton)
M 83-05-08* King Richard III (BBC)(see also Richard)
R 83-05-09 Tavern on Green with JJ and Dennis
R 83-05-10 Siamese Gardens (LA)
T 83-05-10 California and Hawaii with JJ for 18 days
T 83-05-10 Fly from NYC to LA/GettyMuseum/Amy and Adam's
R 83-05-11 Laniloa Hotel Restaurant (Laniloa)
T 83-05-11 La Brea Museum/LACountyMus/FlyLA-Honolulu/Carpenters/Laniloa
R 83-05-12 Kamoamoa Campground (Hawaii)
T 83-05-12 BanzaiPipeline/WaimeaFallsPark/Honolulu-Hilo/KamoamoaCampgrd
R 83-05-13 Lapahoehoe Campground (Hawaii)
T 83-05-13 Chain OfCratersRoad/HalemaumauRim/ThurstonTube/Kalapana/Akaka
R 83-05-14 Kailua Airstrip Campground (Hawaii)
R 83-05-14 Keokea Beach (Hawaii)
T 83-05-14 Waipo Overlook/ParkerRanch/PololuOverlook/LapakahiEthnologyPk
R 83-05-15 Kolekole Park Campground with mango-orange dessert (Hawaii)
T 83-05-15 Saddle Road Mauna Kea/13,800'Peak/RainbowFalls/4-MileDrive
R 83-05-16 Iao Broiler (Maui)
R 83-05-16 Seven Pools Campground (Maui)
T 83-05-16 AkakaFalls/Hilo-Kahului/IaoNeedle/HanaRoadToSevenPools
R 83-05-17 Haleakala Crater Parking Lot
T 83-05-17 Seven Pools/CharlesLindberg'sGrave/Kipahulu/KeaneaArbr/Haleak
R 83-05-18 Captain's Table Restaurant (Kauai)
R 83-05-18 Puhi Restaurant (Kauai)
T 83-05-18 Maui-Waikiki-Kauai/WaimeaCanyon/FlatTireFixed
R 83-05-19 Annini Beach Campground (Kauai)
R 83-05-19 Kokee Restaurant breakfast (Kauai)
R 83-05-19 Puhi Restaurant (Kauai)
T 83-05-19 Waimea Canyon Rim/KalalauLookout/Mt.Poipu/MolaaBeach/Clouds
R 83-05-20 Create-A-Steak (Kauai)
R 83-05-20 Crouching Lion Inn (Oahu)
T 83-05-20 Haena/NapaliCliffs/WailuaFernGrotto/Honolulu/Laniloa
R 83-05-21 Polynesian Cultural Center (Oahu)
T 83-05-21 Polynesian Cultural Center/Laie/Mormon Church/Fly to LA
M 83-05-22* Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid
R 83-05-22 La Choza (LA)
T 83-05-22 Fly Honolulu-LA/JJToParis/nap at Amy's
T 83-05-23 Disneyland all day
R 83-05-24 Ma Maison (LA)
T 83-05-24 Magic Mountain all day/Bradbury Building
R 83-05-25 Hodge's Ribs (LA)
R 83-05-25 Taco lunch (LA)
T 83-05-25 Universal Studios Tour
R 83-05-26 Spago (LA)
T 83-05-26 Queen Mary/SpruceGoose/CC#3StanSmith/SantaMonicaPierArcdGames
T 83-05-27 Fly LA to NYC
R 83-05-31 Noodles with David
E 83-06-01 Uncle Charlie's Downtown
M 83-06-01 Betrayal
M 83-06-02 Local Hero
R 83-06-02 Henry's End
B 83-06-03 White: Maharajah and Other Stories, The
D 83-06-03* Twyla Tharp: Catherine Wheel
B 83-06-04 Matthieson: Cloud Forest, The
D 83-06-04 Ballet Today:VoicesFromCloseBy/NYCSerenade/CharlesIves/GosPm
E 83-06-05 Actualism Summer Gathering at Croton Park
M 83-06-08* King Lear (Olivier)(CBS TV)
M 83-06-08 Return of the Jedi
P 83-06-08 Torch Song Trilogy (Fierstein)
P 83-06-09 Wild Life
E 83-06-12 David Hoch's party
D 83-06-13 Ballet Rehearsal at Met: Don Quixote (Bujones/Baryshnikov)
M 83-06-13* Gotterdammerung (Bayreuth)
O 83-06-13* Gotterdammerung (Bayreuth)
P 83-06-14 Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Dance at Radio City
M 83-06-16* Plainsman
R 83-06-17 Montague Saloon
M 83-06-18* Gilda (Radner) Live
M 83-06-19 Diner
M 83-06-19 Hunger, The
M 83-06-21 Fanny and Alexander
R 83-06-21 Nirvana
R 83-06-22 Nirvana (Actualism)
M 83-06-24 Lasarlumia at Mus. Nat. Hist.
M 83-06-24 Road Warrior
M 83-06-24 Superman III
R 83-06-24 Deli
E 83-06-28 Botswana Tour Information from Rich Barber's
R 83-06-28 Swiss Chalet
P 83-06-29 Caine Mutiny (Moriarty, )
P 83-06-30 Cloud Nine
R 83-06-31 Odeon for my birthday from Dennis
P 83-07-01 Passion (Frank Langella)
R 83-07-01 Tucker's Soul Food
E 83-07-02 Express, L', for drink
P 83-07-02 American Passion at Joyce Theater
M 83-07-03 WarGames
P 83-07-03 Actor's Nightmare, The
P 83-07-03 Sister Mary Ignatius Explains It All To You
E 83-07-04 Fireworks in River
M 83-07-06 Traviata, La (Stratas, Domingo)
O 83-07-06 Nabucco in CP
O 83-07-06 Traviata, La (Stratas, Domingo)
R 83-07-06 Marigold
B 83-07-07 Clarke: Coming of the Space Age
M 83-07-07 Absence of Malice
M 83-07-07 Blue Thunder
R 83-07-07 Metali
M 83-07-09* In Search of the Nile
M 83-07-09* Long Riders
M 83-07-10* Lost City
B 83-07-11 Lem: Return to the Stars
M 83-07-11 Nuit de Varennes, La
B 83-07-12 Clarke: Coast of Coral
B 83-07-12 Nabokov: Quartet
T 83-07-12 Fly to Paris for Africa trip of 34 days
R 83-07-13 Au Quai Des Ormes (great)
R 83-07-13 Pizza (Paris)
T 83-07-13 AuroraBorealisFirstTime!/PizzaLunch/IleSt.LouisBastilleEve
R 83-07-14 (Streetname?) (Paris)
R 83-07-14 La Cremailliere (Beauvais)
T 83-07-14 Beauvais/TapestryGallery/BertillonSherbet/Fireworks11-11:40
D 83-07-15 Bolshoi Ballet: Showcase at Theatre du Champs Elysee (Paris)
R 83-07-15 Shopping Center dinner (Paris)
T 83-07-15 Airport:NoStandbys/NewReservations/TripBackToParis
T 83-07-16 Bus/Metro/FlyAmsterdam/Smirnoff/Vienna/CrowdedPlane
R 83-07-17 Hotel Tanzanite (Arusha)
T 83-07-17 Khartoum/Arusha/DutchGroup/Tracks/Tanzanite/ArushaNP/TentPis
T 83-07-18 Ngordoto Crater/MomelaLakes/DutuliSportsClub/Vodka
T 83-07-19 Arusha/PO/NO GAS/Dutuli/RepitchTents/WalkAroundLake/BarBeers
T 83-07-20 Pack/Photo/WritePostcards/RepitchTents/TrucksReturnWithGas
T 83-07-21 Rift Valley/VulturesOnOryxSkeleton/NgareSareRiverCamp/Masai!
T 83-07-22 Walk Hills/BatheFalls/Card-playingMasai/Photos/Talk/Shit
T 83-07-23 Lake Natron/Flamingos/RiftEscarpment/SerengetiBurnoffFires
T 83-07-24 GameRun:Vervet/5Lions/5Cheetahs/Zebras/Giraffe/Grouse/Hippos
R 83-07-25 Ndutu Tented Camp
T 83-07-25 GameRun:Lions/Hyenas/ZebrasThruCampsite/NdutuTentedCamp/Wine
T 83-07-26 Ngorongoro Rim/MasaiWedding/Hotel-LessCraterFloorValidateTent
T 83-07-26 Olduvai Gorge in Dust/LeakeyMuseum/ZinjanthropusSite/Masai
T 83-07-27 Ostrich/Elephant/Zebra/Wildebeest/Buffalo/HYENA KILL GNU ATE
T 83-07-28 Leopards(3) thru telescope/Ngorongoro ROAD/Gibbs Farm/Manyara
T 83-07-29 Manyara: Hippos/Impala/Zebra/Birds/TradingPost/Twilight/Beer
T 83-07-30 Arusha/HotelTanzanite/LongShower/StrollBeforeBarbequeDinner
T 83-07-31 Diamox/Mike/MountMeruGamePreserve/UsaRiverVillage/KiboHotel
T 83-08-01 Rent Gear/To9000FootMandaraHutby2PM/Rain/DryOut/Chat/Piss
T 83-08-02 Elimwokozi Lekule/SNOW-CAPPEDMt.Kili/12,000FootHoromboHut1:30
T 83-08-03 INTENSE sun to Kibo Hut at 15,000 feet at 1PM/Tea/Nap by 6PM
T 83-08-04 CLIMB GILMAN'S POINT by 7AM, to Kibo 9-11, Horombo by 3/nap
T 83-08-05 BOOTS WRECK FEET down to Mandara Hut/TaxiKiboHotel/Dinner
T 83-08-06 Native craft shop, Carl not at 10 but 4:30/Truck breakdown
T 83-08-07 Usa River Village Market/Evening chat with Doug Clarke
T 83-08-08 Arusha sightseeing with Carl and boy/Hotel Dinner/NightFlite
M 83-08-09 Guerre Du Fer, La (Ironmaster)
R 83-08-09 La Cremailliere (Montmartre)
T 83-08-09 Khartoum/Vienna/Amsterdam/Paris/nap/unpack
R 83-08-10 Dinner with lover-friends of JJ's (Paris)
T 83-08-10 Gustave MoreauMus/Beaubourg/snack lunch
R 83-08-11 L'Escargot Montorgeuil
T 83-08-11 Saint Germain En Laye/NationalAntiquitiesMus/AmusementPark
R 83-08-12 Laperouse (Paris)
R 83-08-12 Paris Zoo lunch (Paris)
T 83-08-12 Marne-La-Valle/JJ'sProject/Zoo
R 83-08-13 Ferte-sous-Joarre (Ferte-sous-Joarre) **
R 83-08-13 Hostelerie du Chateau (Fere-en-Tardenois) **
T 83-08-13 Fere-en-Tardenois/ReimsCathedral/WalkeureRadio/Ferte-s-Joare
M 83-08-14 Best Friends
T 83-08-14 Fly Paris to NYC
M 83-08-18 Gai Dimanche (Tati)
M 83-08-18 Soignez Ton Gauche (Tati)
M 83-08-18 Traffic
R 83-08-18 Tamu (Actualism)
B 83-08-19 Nabokov: Bend Sinister
E 83-08-19 Mickey Mouse on Ice at Madison Square Garden
E 83-08-19 Tower Records/Strand Books/Physique Memorabilia Shopping
M 83-08-19 Terminal Station
M 83-08-20* Rumor of War, A
B 83-08-21 Burroughs: Third Mind, The
E 83-08-21 Physique Memorabilia 4 hrs:take24Film/15Phot/$15/Get12Flm30P
M 83-08-21* Towering Inferno
M 83-08-22 Tom and Jerry and Road Runner Cartoons
M 83-08-25 Flash Dance
B 83-08-26 Moon: Jupiter Experiment, The
E 83-08-26 Earth Angel dessert
R 83-08-26 Tibetan Kitchen
M 83-08-27* Doc Savage, Man of Bronze
B 83-08-28 Levine: Who Dies?
M 83-08-29 Chuck Jones Exclusives (cartoons)
M 83-08-29 Tex Avery on Sex
E 83-08-31 Actualism American Consciousness/I show Africa slides
E 83-09-01 Tiffany Glass exhibit
P 83-09-01 Agnes of God
R 83-09-01 Siam Inn
B 83-09-02 Hofstadter: Godel, Escher, Bach
M 83-09-04 Pauline on the Beach
R 83-09-04 Sawadee
B 83-09-07 Nabokov: Details of a Sunset
M 83-09-07* Mass (Bernstein)
B 83-09-09 Clarke: First Five Fathoms
B 83-09-09 Vonnegut: Sun Moon Star
E 83-09-09 Queen Ida and her Zydeco Band at Folk City
B 83-09-10 Haggard: When the World Shook
B 83-09-12 Clarke: Reefs of Taprobane
E 83-09-13 Gay Computer Club Meeting, first of series
M 83-09-13* Moulin Rouge
R 83-09-13 Villa del Parral
M 83-09-14 Staying Alive
M 83-09-15* Search for the Gods
R 83-09-15 Tibetan Kitchen (Actualism)
E 83-09-16 Brooklyn Museum
M 83-09-16* Sign of the Cross
R 83-09-16 China Pavilion
B 83-09-17 Heisenberg: Physical Principles of Quantum Theory
E 83-09-17 Brooklyn Botanic Gardens
E 83-09-18 Shop Canal Street/Canal St. Pier/Morton St. Pier
E 83-09-18 Susannah McCorkle at Village West
M 83-09-18 Indian Tomb
M 83-09-18 Tiger of Eschnapur
R 83-09-18 Village West
M 83-09-19 Lianna
M 83-09-19 Return of the Secaucus Seven
S 83-09-19 I cum in gym steam with guy (who doesn't)
M 83-09-20* Rheingold, Das (Bayreuth)
O 83-09-20* Rheingold (Bayreuth)
B 83-09-21 Wolfe: Shadow of the Torturer
M 83-09-21* Walkure, Die (Bayreuth)
O 83-09-21* Walkure (Bayreuth)
M 83-09-22* Siegfried, Acts I and II (Bayreuth)
M 83-09-22* Siegfried, Act III (Bayreuth)
O 83-09-22* Siegfried, Act III (Bayreuth)
O 83-09-22* Siegfried, Acts I and II (Bayreuth)
E 83-09-23 Dana's party for Amy
M 83-09-24* Gotterdammerung (Bayreuth)
O 83-09-24* Gotterdammerung (Bayreuth)
M 83-09-26 Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy
M 83-09-26 Tempest (Mazursky)
P 83-09-26 Be Still Thunder at ELT daytime
R 83-09-26 Joanne's
B 83-09-27 Lewis: Four Loves
T 83-09-28 Hemlock Hall for 5 days/drinks with Griswolds/canoe in eveng
T 83-09-29 Owl's Head/Fire Tower/Photographers for drinks/Africa slides
T 83-09-30 Mushrooms along lakes/James's Egypt slides
T 83-10-01 Fly over Adirondacks with James/John's EXCELLENT readings
E 83-10-02 Alice's party
T 83-10-02 Stops for books, apples, pumpkins, to James's in ForestHills
M 83-10-03 Zelig
R 83-10-03 Raja Sahib
R 83-10-04 Old Hungary with Mom
B 83-10-05 Weinberg: First Three Minutes
P 83-10-05 Cats (side-stage with Mom)
P 83-10-06 Photographer at BAM
R 83-10-06 Golden Nut
P 83-10-07 My One And Only (Tommy Tune, Twiggy Out)
R 83-10-07 Luchow's
E 83-10-08 Middletown for Hot-Air Ballooning
R 83-10-08 English Pub
M 83-10-09* Alice in Wonderland (Burtons)
M 83-10-09* Tarzan and His Mate
P 83-10-09 Lady's Not For Burning at ELT
R 83-10-09 Baan Thai
B 83-10-11 Heinlein: Friday
D 83-10-11* Joffrey Ballet: Green Table
D 83-10-16 Joan Lombardi:Tango/Zeitgeist/Grown-UpBones/Crychord
M 83-10-16* Tarzan Escapes
R 83-10-16 Baan Thai
B 83-10-17 Niven: Lucifer's Hammer
P 83-10-18 Cage Aux Folles, La
B 83-10-19 Campbell: Mythic Image, The
R 83-10-20 Sawadee (Actualism)
O 83-10-22* Metropolitan Opera Centennial Performance
R 83-10-23 Golden Ass
R 83-10-23 Saigon
B 83-10-25 Yu: Journey to the West, Volume 1
R 83-10-25 Hunan 72
R 83-10-25 Sapporo Larmen
R 83-10-26 Noodles
S 83-10-27 JO #1
D 83-10-29 Zivili
B 83-10-30 Adams: Life, The Universe, and Everything
M 83-10-31 Barbarosa
M 83-10-31 Chant of Jimmy Blacksmith
R 83-10-31 Captain Nemo's
B 83-11-03 Wolfe: Claw of the Conciliator, The
S 83-11-03 JO #2
M 83-11-06 Land of the Never-Never
M 83-11-06 Man from Snowy River
R 83-11-08 Wylie's Ribs
B 83-11-09 Yu: Journey to the West, Volume 2
M 83-11-09* Cunning Little Vixen (NYC Opera)
O 83-11-09* Cunning Little Vixen (NYC Opera)
M 83-11-10 Return of Martin Guerre
M 83-11-10* Secret of the Incas
S 83-11-10 JO #3
D 83-11-11 Tulsa Ballet: Convolutions/4Moons/HandOfFate/GaiteParisienne
B 83-11-12 Wolfe: Sword of the Lictor
R 83-11-12 Imperial Dragon West with Mike and Renie
S 83-11-12 JO Party on 14th St.
D 83-11-13 Henry Smith:DzambaYaBilima(withCongoleseNationalBallet)
D 83-11-13 Irene Feigenheimer: Rewind
D 83-11-13 Liz Lerman:Journey/Docudance
D 83-11-13 Ohad Naharin: HaruNoUmi/PadDePepsi/I'veMadeAMistake
R 83-11-13 Minimax with Renie
M 83-11-15 Christine F.
M 83-11-15 Just a Gigolo (David Bowie)
P 83-11-15 Music Man at ELT
E 83-11-16 South Street Seaport with Dorothy Kent
M 83-11-16 Circle of Deceit
M 83-11-16 Querelle
B 83-11-17 Vonnegut: Deadeye Dick
S 83-11-17 JO #4
M 83-11-18* Blowout
M 83-11-18* Taps
D 83-11-19 Caracas Ballet
M 83-11-20* Day After, The
M 83-11-21* Diva
M 83-11-21* Mad Max
M 83-11-22* My Dinner With Andre
M 83-11-22* Q
B 83-11-23 Wolfe: Citadel of the Autarch
M 83-11-23* Tarzan, the Ape Man (Bo Derek)
R 83-11-24 Fraunces Tavern with Dennis for Thanksgiving Dinner
S 83-11-24 JO #5
M 83-11-25* Gregory's Girl
M 83-11-25* Making of a Male Model
M 83-11-25* Winter Kills
M 83-11-26* Heaven's Gate
M 83-11-26* Magic Flute (Martins Ballet)
M 83-11-26* Medea (Zoe Caldwell)
M 83-11-28* Brimstone and Treacle
M 83-11-28* Missionary, The
B 83-11-29 Burroughs: Port of Saints
M 83-11-29* Deathtrap
M 83-11-29* Richard Pryor Live on Sunset Strip
M 83-11-30* Heaven Can Wait (Beatty)
M 83-11-30* High Road to China
B 83-12-01 Toben: Space-Time and Beyond
S 83-12-01 JO #6
M 83-12-04* Snow Queen Ice Ballet
M 83-12-05* Bolero
P 83-12-05 Women of Fortune
M 83-12-06* Eight and a Half
M 83-12-06* Richard Pryor in Concert
M 83-12-07* Elephant Man
M 83-12-07* Eyewitness
R 83-12-07 Atlantic House
M 83-12-08* Prototype (4444th movie viewing)
S 83-12-08 JO #7
M 83-12-09* Stepping Out: The DeBolts Grow Up
M 83-12-09* Who Are DeBolts&Where Did TheyGet l9 Kids?
E 83-12-12 Actualism Willkie Hall Gathering
M 83-12-12* George Carlin at Carnegie
M 83-12-12* Police Around the World
O 83-12-12* Callas Gala
M 83-12-13* Cook and Peary Race to the Pole
M 83-12-13* Ghost Story
M 83-12-13* Hurricane (Mia Farrow)
S 83-12-15 JO #8
E 83-12-17 Barbara Lea at Jan Wallman's
P 83-12-17 For the Use of the Hall
R 83-12-17 Jan Wallman's
B 83-12-19 Barth: Sabbatical
M 83-12-19* Kip Noll Superstar Part I
M 83-12-19* Rollover
M 83-12-20* Compleat Beatles
M 83-12-20* New York Men
M 83-12-21 Ernani (Met)
O 83-12-21 Ernani (Met)
M 83-12-22 Terms of Endearment
M 83-12-22 Yentl
P 83-12-22 Night ['Night], Mother
R 83-12-22 Movenpick
E 83-12-24 Grace Church Midnight Mass with Ken and Shellie
O 83-12-24 Tristan und Isolde (Jung,Behrens,Troyanos,Haugland)
P 83-12-24 Present Laughter (George C. Scott)
B 83-12-25 Blackwood: Tongues of Fire
M 83-12-25* Funny Lady
M 83-12-28* Continental Divide
S 83-12-29 JO #9
E 83-12-31 Bach at Unitarian Church/New Year's Eve Party with Joe
P 83-12-31 Human Comedy